Sunday, June 24, 2012

Oh, What a ... Morning!

I have been pretty into green smoothies lately, and I decided I might try to make them in the morning as breakfast instead of my usual oatmeal. People always talk about how they are such a good start to the day, so I really figured I should try it for myself to find out.

Oh, how I despise changing up the routine! Why does it seem that every time I wake up with some sort of plan for my morning, Liam also wakes up feeling especially irritable? And why, then, does everything seem to go downhill from there?

Most mornings, I know how my day is going to go based on the way Liam wakes up. If he wakes up quietly and seems to be pondering, the day could really be good or bad. If he wakes up smiley and ready to play, I am usually going to have a fairly easy day with him. But, if he wakes up and starts getting whiny before I can even roll myself out of bed, and proceeds to throw a fit as I attempt to slap on whatever clothing is closest, I can almost bet, there won't be a shower or a warm meal in it for mommy this morning.

Well... let's take a guess how my morning started on the one day I wanted to change things up a bit and try a green smoothie for breakfast instead of the 2 minute oatmeal I normally have. Yeah... that's what I get, but guess who decided to shoot for the green smoothie anyway.

So, we come downstairs. I change Liam's diaper, put him in his walker. These are both normal parts of our morning. He plays for a little while, chasing the cats and throwing toys. ;o) I start the smoothie process, pulling out all the things I'm going to throw into this little green power house: kale, chia seeds, celery, carrots, apple, banana, peanut butter, almond milk, plain yogurt, etc. I get started on all the chopping, pouring, slicing, and once I have all the ingredients in the blender, I am feeling pretty good. Liam is still having a good time in the living room, and all seems well. Do you happen to hear some signature "shark attack" music in your head right now? Or maybe even a menacing, "Dun...Dun... DUN!"

Good, then we're right on track. I turn the blender on, and my 15 year old blender (the new one we got for our wedding a few years ago stripped the gears in my green smoothie making), and it made this slight shift to the side. I grabbed onto it thinking the top was going to blow off or something. Nothing happened, so I felt fairly safe. I just decided to hold onto it the rest of the time. But then... the blender started to make a different kind of whirring noise and didn't seem to be blending as efficiently (as a 15 year old blender can blend). I tried setting the speed higher, but the noise continued. I shut off the blender, and out of the corner of my eye I notice something green.

"Well, duh! You are making a green smoothie, Kylie. Just where exactly is this story going?" You may be thinking to yourself.

No! I mean, I noticed something green oozing out onto my counter... like the blob, only I was much more afraid of this. My green smoothie was leaking out the bottom of my blender, so I, being the genius I am most mornings, started to liftg the top of the blender off the base and... green slop comes flushing out everywhere! I drop the blender back on the base, and I cannot tell you what possessed me to do what I did next... I really can't figure out how I thought this was a good idea.



I picked up the blender from the base yet again. When the rest of the green slop started pouring out, I decided I had lost the war and just let it all flow out as I stood there thinking about the 6 cups of organic ingredients that were literally about to go down the drain. Awesome... And did I mention that Liam was having a full blown crazy fit by this point? So, not only did I get to waste all those wonderful, gorgeous ingredients. I got to attempt to clean up a mess worse than exploding poop from all over my counter fast enough to make Liam happy. I was not successful.

No worries, though. I ended up getting it all cleaned up, gave Liam a bottle, got him calmed back down, and later, I was able to completely remake my original green smoothie, and... it even turned out pretty well. So well, in fact, that my husband even drank one after work. I wish I could tell you how important that last fact is, but let it suffice to say my husband very, VERY rarely puts green things on his plate. ;o)

So, would you like the recipe? I mean, there must be some good to come from all my toiling and moments of insanity. Sure. Let's go with that.

Peanut Butter Banana Green Smoothie 
  Serves 2! 
  •  2 lacinato kale leaves with stems cut out (should be very large)
  • ½ cup baby carrots
  • ½ avocado (omit if you do not want a creamy smoothie)
  • ½ cup almond milk (1 cup if you do not want a thick smoothie)
  • ½ cup organic plain probiotic yogurt
  • 1/2 cup celery, chopped (2 6-7” stalks)
  •  ½ cup frozen blueberries
  •  6-8 frozen strawberries
  • 1 very ripe banana
  • 1 cored, sliced small red apple
  • 3 tbsp coconut oil melted
  • 2 heaping Tbsp raw, no salt peanut butter
  • 4 tbsp chia seeds
  • 1 cup ice (1 ½ cups if you do not want a thick smoothie)
Cut the stem from the kale. Chop into 1” sections. I like to place it in my cloth steam bag at this point and steam it in the microwave for 30 seconds so it isn’t so rough. Throw it all in the blender and blend all until very smooth, being sure to place the liquid on the bottom. Makes about 38 oz (with only ½ cup of almond milk and 1 cup of ice). Divide and enjoy! To me, this tasted like a peanut butter and banana smoothie. I really couldn’t taste any of the other ingredients, and my husband agreed.

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