Wednesday, June 17, 2009

The Call Back

Well, my dad called back last night, just as he said he would. I had prayed before talking to him. I talked it out with God and told Him all my insecurities about letting my dad have a bigger place in my life now, and God was really encouraging me to open my heart to my dad. I don't have to trust that my dad will always make good on his word or that he will never hurt me, but I do trust God, in that He has a plan in all of this. If I get hurt by my dad along the way, emotionally, I will just have to turn to God to heal that pain. God wants me to love others. That was one of his greatest commandments. I don't get to pick and choose who I will allow myself to love. God wants us to love others. When He said that, He didn't say we got to choose which others. In my case, "others" is including even my dad who was absent for so much of my life.

So, while I had my dad on the phone last night, I told him how proud I was of him. I am proud that he calls so often and that he has a job. He said that it meant so much to him to know that I loved him. After that we talked for awhile about God and our purposes. My dad thinks he is called to share the Gospels, which I wouldn't doubt. His dad was a pastor, so he's had the background. He said he knew a lady that was having a hard time a few weeks ago, and he helped her out. She told him he was a guardian angel, and he told her, "I don't know about that." He said they got to talking, and he had an opportunity to tell her about Jesus. It was really nice to hear him talk like that.

I also told him that he doesn't deserve to carry around all the guilt he does. He apologized, and I am ready to move on and accept the apology.

After we had talked for a little while, he said he would like to come up the first of the month and pay for the car in cash. He has already talked to someone about getting it back to Kentucky for him, so it seems this is really happening. I told my dad it seems like a huge blessing from God right exactly when we needed it most. My fiance will only have one pay check next month, and if my dad does pay us $500 for my car, it will cover almost exactly what we need it to cover. My dad said it was like a miracle that he had asked about it, and I agreed with him. Like I said, his memory is slipping, but if it hadn't been, he wouldn't have asked about it again, and I wouldn't have explained our financial situation to him. There is no such thing as coincidence when God is involved!