Thursday, October 1, 2009

Need To Breathe

Lately, I have been really busy with my crochet business, and I have not had really any time to do anything else...

I have a stack of books I really want to just take a week off to read. I have so many ideas for my own crochet projects that I want to do. I have 3 or 4 more orders in my crochet business waiting to start. The good thing about those is that I will get to use my creative license again. I hate not being able to choose colors, experiment, and have fun with crochet. On the other hand, I have been making baby cocoons and preemie baby cocoons, and I just feel so blessed to have been asked to help. It is one of the sweetest jobs I have ever had, and I can't help but get caught up in it. I can only imagine the sweet, soft little babies that will be held, cuddled, and loved in the very cocoons woven from my own two hands. Every time I finish a cocoon, I hold it out in my arms as if it were full of a chubby cheeked little one, and I can't help but feel blessed and part of something bigger than myself.

These cocoons are going to India...I know I keep harping on this, but I just feel so honored. I can't believe how far my life has come.

In another area of my life, there is a lot of change happening as well. I have spoken on my blog a little bit about Reiki, or "hands on healing." I have always been drawn to people, for as long as I can remember. I feel specifically drawn to hurting people and even more specifically to those hurting emotionally. I am so utterly fascinated with the way people think and the inner workings of our minds. I love to just listen to people. I don't always, rarely even, have any advice to give, but I love to listen. Something about it just makes me content.

Anyway, a friend of mine recently expressed their concern with my choice to follow a path toward Reiki, and I wanted to give you all a website to check out in case you were feeling that same concern. When I post on here, I want everyone's honest opinions. I am curious to see what you all think, and when you become a trusted friend of mine, I actually take your words to heart. This website is called Christian Reiki and I just want to let all of you out there know that I would not be going into this if I felt it went against my beliefs as a Christian.

Today, I spent a little bit of time in prayer talking to God about why I want to learn more about Reiki. I explained to Him that I have always felt led to people who are hurting, and I desperately want to be able to help them while getting closer to my God at the same time. I want to deepen my relationship with God but also deepen my own spiritual understanding, and I believe Reiki will help me to do that. It won't, however, replace my search to understand God better or my study of the Bible. That is my ultimate goal of learning Reiki. I want to help others, myself, and deepen my spirituality and relationship with God.

I asked God to show me how He was feeling about this, to lead me and guide me. I asked Him to let me know if He didn't want me to follow this path, but I still feel at peace with it. I opened myself up 100% to God's will, even though I have already paid for my class and cannot get my money back. I am perfectly fine with that if God were to tell me that this is the wrong path for me or that I won't end up helping people or loving people after following this path.

I am not writing this post because I feel I have to justify my decision to anyone. I am writing this post because I enjoy the feedback my fellow bloggers give. I am writing this post in case anyone else had this question for me as well but was struggling with how to bring it up kindly. I am writing this post because it is weighing heavily on my heart right now to let you all know that God is my God, and I will never say otherwise. I am here to love, and I feel led to heal. Our spirits go through battle constantly in such a changing world, and I feel led to cleanse them and show people this wonderful, warm light that I know as my God. I am not ashamed of this. It is all part of the process, and I feel very much peace about this process.

The busier I get, and I am very busy right now, the more I need to depend on God, the more I need to devote time to learning about Him. I would not have this talent without God, and I cannot thrive under the pressure without God. I have been very blessed as of late, and I want you all to know you can have this love and this blessing in your life as well. All you have to do is ask. Jesus will hear you wherever you are, whatever you are doing, No...Matter...What.

Be love!


  1. You need to take a bit of break for yourself. That is my advice!
    Glad that you find solace in God, but it is up to you to take the time.

  2. Hey Snot Head, I just sent you a LONG email which I'm not going to cover here.

    However, for the benefit of anyone else who is thinking through these things - or something completely different - if an issue you are facing is causing you to doubt it, even just slightly, then I think you're better off waiting until you have come to a satisfactory answer before moving ahead. Especially when dealing with issues that are connected with matters of faith.