Saturday, November 15, 2008

After a very strange week for me emotionally, I feel back to normal. I had been itching to write a song about the two girls. Last night, I had the house to myself for awhile, so I went where my heart took me. I can't say that any of you will ever get to hear the song, not even my nearest and dearest. I didn't record it. I didn't write it down. I don't even feel sad about that like I normally would. It was not meant for the world to hear, and it was not meant to gain recognition. It was just meant to clean my soul a bit.

I have to say, I really love this blogging thing. When I was really down this week, and I posted my blog, I got a lot of comments pretty much letting me know I was not alone. I also read the blogs of some other ladies around Middleofnowheresville, USA, and I felt much more at ease knowing my feelings were normal and shared. Once again, the blogging world came to my rescue! :)

I went to another concert last night. I am still not comfortable up front where the action is. So much so that when a mosh pit happened, and I was watching from a table over yonder, I got a wiff of beer. Mix that with my anxiety about having my head busted open again, and you get the pukey feeling in your stomach and the feeling of something warm running down your body (no, not pee! haha). I don't know when I will be comfortable rocking out up front again, and that is really a sad thing for me. When we go to watch our boys (Verdict, check em out on myspace; www.myspace.com/verdictmusic) I can feel their passion in the songs they sing. The music just moves through me, and it is healing for me. Whatever crap I have dealt with in the week, I can just hold my head up and tell all the bad stuff to go to H***. (haha, You can tell I'm not much of a cusser.) Someone has taken that away from me, though, and they don't even have the gall to tell me who it was. I honestly could care less about the bottle and the stitches, not that I want them again. What hurts the most is that someone has made me afraid to do something I really love.

Anyway, I am really feeling "free-er" (I believe I should talk in my blog exactly how I would probably talk to you if you were in front of me. My sister can vouch for that!! haha). I'm off to do some shopping today for some fabric! Retail therapy!! Haha

1 comment:

  1. retail therapy can be good and I have a closet full of yarn to back me up.

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